


I'll Crawl Home to Her

by castledfranks



Category: Chicago PD (TV)
Genre: F/M, Hospitalization, Protective Jay, post-Nadia's death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-02
Updated: 2017-03-02
Packaged: 2018-09-27 22:35:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,684
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10054604
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/castledfranks/pseuds/castledfranks
Summary: Erin's hospitalized after OD'ing on drugs and Jay raises hell with Hank, Bunny and Landon.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Just moving all my works from Tumblr. Comment if you like :)

_How did we get here? How could I have let her slip so far away that we’ve ended up… right here_

A million questions whirled around in his mind as Jay sat impatiently on the floor of Chicago Med’s private waiting room. He’d been here before… just after the bartender of his favorite dive took a bullet meant for him. But this time was different. 

This time it was Erin. 

Jay knew she was on shaky ground after Nadia’s murder. He knew and he did nothing to keep her from drowning. He tried, but not hard enough. He should have forced his way in. 

_No._ He knew Erin all too well. The harder he pushed, the further away she got. He knew he had to let her deal with the loss on her own, but he never expected this. 

She’d OD-ed on prescription pills, no doubt supplied by that weasel she grew up with, the one her mom kept repeatedly shoving down her throat. What was his name? Honestly, Jay didn’t care. If he saw the guy, he’d rip his heart square out of his chest and he didn’t care who saw. One glance at her near lifeless body lying in that sterile hospital room sent the dangerous mix of rage and devastation flooding over him like a tidal wave. It was almost too much to handle. He was barely keeping himself together. 

Will must have noticed Jay’s fists beginning to ball up because he rested a gentle hand on his brother’s shoulder to steady him. Jay took a deep breath to calm his heartbeat, but it was really no use. He couldn’t calm down. Not until Erin woke up. Not until he was allowed to go in and see her, touch her, let her know how sorry he was for not doing more to try and save her from her pain. Let her know how much he cared about her. So much left to say. 

When the doors open, Jay glanced up to see Voight enter, his expression full of anger. “You,” he said, pointing his finger into Will’s chest. “Keep them out of here.” He threw a thumb over his shoulder as Bunny waltzed in behind him, her cheap purse strewn over her shoulder haphazardly. She was followed closely by Landon, and Jay instantly tensed up. 

Will threw a worried glance down to his brother, and Jay instinctively rose. He knew what Voight meant, and he was putting Will in an awkward position. “Sergeant Voight…” 

Hank shook his head, knowing what he was about to say, and Will licked his lips; it was clear Voight was looking for a reason to get loud, to verbally unleash his wrath because he couldn’t do much else for Erin. “Sir,” Will continued, his hands up in front of his chest. “There’s nothing I can do. Bunny’s entitled to be here, just like you. She’s family.” 

“And I want Landon here,” she quickly added. 

Voight bit his bottom lip. “The only family Erin’s got is her CPD family, you hear me!?” 

Bunny rolled her eyes. “For God’s sake Hank, give it a rest.” 

Jay swore he saw Voight’s eyes bug all the way out of his head as he stepped towards Erin’s mother, anger clearly rolling off his shoulders. “This is your fault!” His voice rose. “If you cared at all about your daughter, the second she showed up at that bar you should’ve sent her the hell home. Instead you hooked her up with that deadbeat and NOW look where we are. Look where we are Bunny!” 

Jay shook his head and retreated to the opposite corner, sliding down the wall to a sitting position on the floor and resting his elbows on his knees. Sure, he thought Bunny was a piss-poor excuse for a mother, someone who had no business having children in the first place. But it wasn’t his place to voice that. Besides, he was far too concerned about Erin to bother himself with anything else, and he was afraid if he opened his mouth, he wouldn’t be able to shut it. 

Will left to check in with Erin’s doctor and Voight and Bunny continued verbally lashing each other, with Landon standing quietly behind her. The guy’s eyes were heavy and unfocused, his arms crossed over his chest. Every so often, his hand would scratch his bicep. Was he high? Jay couldn’t tell. Hell he couldn’t pay close enough attention to anything except Voight and Bunny. Five minutes, ten minutes, fifteen passed and finally, his head felt like it was about to explode. 

“Enough!” he shouted, pounding his fist back against the wall, sending the picture hanging above crashing to the ground. He scrambled to his feet and locked eyes with a stunned Voight. 

Jay ran his hand over his hair. “For God’s sake, give it a rest already! If you can’t put a lid on it for ten seconds, then you shouldn’t be here!” 

Voight’s eyes narrowed. “What did you just say to me?” 

Jay shook his head. He was tired of allowing Voight to railroad him. This wasn’t Intelligence; Voight held no rank over him here. “What if Erin woke up right now, huh? You think the first thing she needs to hear is the two of you hurling insults at each other?“ 

“Who the hell do you think you are,” Bunny spat. “You can’t talk to me that way. She’s my daughter!” 

“And that gives you the right to turn this room into an episode of Springer? Please.” Jay’s lips turned upwards, but the malice in his voice told them both that he was anything but joking. 

Landon came up next to him. “I think maybe we should let these two hash it out,” he said, his voice almost a whisper as he rested a hand on Jay’s shoulder. 

Jay stood frozen in place as he sucked in a strangled breath. “Do NOT…” Finally he put his hand up. “Remove your hand… now.” He glanced halfway over his shoulder towards Landon. 

But he didn’t. Instead, the idiot squeezed harder, as if getting ready to pull Jay back, and told him to back off. 

What happened next, Jay couldn’t explain. With one swift motion, Jay incapacitated Landon, grabbed him by the neck and slammed him against the wall. He kicked the chairs in his path away and lifted him off the ground, digging his nails into the side of Landon’s neck. “You’ve got some nerve showing up here high as a kite while she’s clinging to life because of your shit,” he growled through gritted teeth. “Even more nerve telling me to back off.” 

Landon coughed and Jay gripped tighter. 

“I’ll tell you something. If Erin doesn’t pull through, I will hunt you down and put a bullet in you myself.” 

Landon’s eyes darted nervously to Voight as Bunny leapt forward and grabbed onto Jay’s forearm, desperately tugging and trying to loosen his grip while shrieking at Voight to ‘call off his dog’. 

“Aint nothing I can do for you here,” his gravely voice answered, and it was all the encouragement Jay needed to once more tighten his grip. 

“Let go!” Bunny cried as Landon’s face began to turn a shade of purple Jay recognized. He quickly released him and Landon curled over, gasping and coughing. Bunny rubbed his back and shot a look of disgust up at Jay. 

When Landon regained his voice, he rubbed his throat and glanced up to Jay. “You wouldn’t do that,” he said, a small smile forming and quickly disappearing from his lips. 

Jay grinned wildly and knelt down next to them, looking once at Bunny before honing in on Landon once more. “Look at me,” he barked, pulling Landon’s face towards his as he tried to look away. “If she doesn’t wake up in the next hour, I promise you… I will find you, and I’ll kill you.” He slapped Landon in the face and rose to his feet. “Now get the hell out of here. Both of you.” 

As Bunny and Landon retreated and the door shut, Jay stepped towards the window to Erin’s room and put his hands on his hips as he glanced inside. Her eyes were still shut, the tube in her throat slowly rising and falling with every breath she took. He couldn’t get over how weak she looked. He’d never seen her this way before, and it tore him apart inside. 

“She’s gonna pull through,” Voight said behind him. 

Jay simply nodded his head and wiped his hand over his face, his fingers grazing over the five o’clock shadowed that had begun to dust his cheeks and chin. 

“You know, you can head out. I’ll stay with her.” 

Jay turned and made a face, offended. “I’m not going anywhere.” 

Voight sighed and licked his lips, crossing his arms over his chest. “You’re needed at the station.” 

“I’m needed here,” he countered, his voice firm. 

“Halstead…” 

But Jay put his hand up to stop him. “Save it, I’m not going anywhere.” He turned his back to Voight momentarily before his anger got the best of him. “No, you know what? I’m done tiptoeing around you when it comes to my feelings for Erin. You will never understand what we mean to each other, what we’ve push aside to appease you. I LOVE her, okay? And if you want to yell at me, berate me, kick me out of Intelligence, go ahead. But the only way you’re getting me to leave here right now is if you drag my cold dead body out the fucking front door. So either start shooting, or back the hell off!” 

Something shifted between them in that moment; Jay wasn’t quite sure what it was. But Voight backed off. In fact, he patted Jay on the shoulder before retreating to a seat and shutting his eyes. Was he giving his blessing? His approval? Jay hoped so. Now all he needed was for Erin to wake up so they can finally have a real shot at the happiness they both deserved. 

_Just wake up… please._


End file.
